Something Like Heaven, part five

(Previous installments can be found here. This is the final installment.)
When I awoke, it was daylight again. A lazy column of smoke meandered up from the now dead fire, and Joe was tapping my shoulder, trying to wake me.
His ship, he said, should be recharged by now. He seemed ready to go, and was waiting [...]

The street where you live

…is likely filled with idiots.
We live in a “new” neighborhood. I’ve previously described it as the corner of Crack and Ho (my friend A Bitch lives with her sister C-Money close by at the corner of Crack and Den), but our eight city blocks were razed and replaced with townhouses and detached single-family homes. Despite [...]

Something like heaven, part four

(Part three here.)
Joe’s people didn’t have a word for luck, and as I tried to think of a way to explain the concept, I realized my own grasp of my mother tongue was tenuous and vague. All that came to mind at first were four-leaf clovers, rabbit’s feet, and leprechauns.
“Luck,” I said, “is when events [...]

Zinger

“But there is one question this volume answers conclusively: Why Readers Nap.“
Walter Kirn on “How Fiction Works” by James Wood.
Does that mean he didn’t like it, then?

Where we went last night

To the backwoods with Barbie.
And it was a great trip.
(One of my favorite moments: when a backup dancer/stagehand came out with a new guitar for her to play and she said to the audience: “Hey girls, don’t you think he’s real cute?” And then after the girls had stopped cheering, she said: “And hey boys, [...]

Personally, I’m rooting for the elephants

After centuries of being eaten, evicted, subjected to vivisection, killed for fun, worn as hats and made to ride bicycles in circuses, something is causing them to turn on us.

If you go

…over here, you’ll see the cover of the anthology (co-edited by two people whom I admire greatly) in which one of my stories will appear. Not only that, but he’s in there, and so is he, and he, and he, and he! Very exciting!

“I’ll see you at the debates, bitches”

OK, I thought this day would never come, but after watching this, I kind of like Paris Hilton now. Thanks, white-haired dude. I blame you.
I hope she does something completely reprehensible soon so my world can be restored to its previous state of equilibrium.

Something Like Heaven, part three

(Parts one and two here.)
He—and I don’t know how I knew this, but I was certain the figure was male—stared up at me with large, opaque green eyes. His skin was a pearlescent, hairless white, and he wore a form-fitting, silvery jumpsuit that changed color with each movement. Not that he was moving very much; [...]

If you’re wondering

…whether you will get an offer for a job following the interview, here’s a sign: if you interviewed on Monday, and you find the position has been reposted to Craigslist on Friday, you probably aren’t going to get a call back.